summertime sadness.

as I sit here, hunched over, sobbing into my lean cuisine, I can't even believe that summer is over. 

I spent my morning signing papers about dress codes, not sexually harassing people at the work place, putting fake food into a fake fridge and trying not to get anal over if the word "Preschool" is centered on my bulletin board.

i am beginning my third year as a preschool teacher. people always say life goes so fast, but they never really tell you how fast it actually goes. I can't believe it's almost September of 2015.

 That literally sounds like I should be living in the future.

 This summer we had the busiest but most amazing summer ever!

swimming lessons and 3 sixty scenery kept us very busy so thankfully, Bryan and I were able to spend over a month of dedicated-one-on-one-together-time STRAIGHT on our vacations. we lit'rally did not leave each others sides for one month.

here are a few of the highlights. 

I was able to be a bridesmaid in one of my best friends weddings

and break it down while singing her wedding song.

AND we rode in a canoe!
my dream.

 We spent a week in Oregon, floating the river, picking blackberries, swimming in Three Pools, looking at Gray whales off the coast, spending time with my shrub and her cute kids (and Allen).

We spent a few days in beautiful Coeur d'Alene, ID.

 and I met my nephew, Reuben.

not to mention we bought this beauty....

 

(and no, we aren't vegan now...)

 Don't forget we went to Kenya (and Amsterdam)!

 and a huge shout-out to Bryan for catching his first fish!!!!!

so let us once again let "HAGS" RIP, until next year...

but like I always say... "kiss me hard before you go. 

summertime sadness"

asante sana squashed banana.

Bryan and I recently returned home from the trip of a lifetime! 

With my parents, aunt & uncle, two younger brothers, and a group of about 7 other people we set off on a humanitarian trip to Kenya, Africa

Since I have been home, people have repeatedly said to me "you go to Africa all the time". To set the record straight, this was my third time, and probably my favorite time. 

The number one thing that sets this trip apart from the other trips was being able to experience it with Bryan.
I have had such a love for Africa in my heart, and I sort of felt like that was the one thing Bryan didn't understand. I really do feel like he has seen and knows my WHOLE heart now-- so cheesy, but so true. 

I have seen different sides of people as they travel to these third world countries.  It was so fun to see my parents to relaxed and enjoying themselves, and totally and completely in their element.  It was so cool to see my two younger brothers being so helpful and working so hard. 

It was so fun to see Bryan in every way.  He was extremely helpful. He worked SO hard.  He NEVER complained. He was the first to volunteer to help.  He was so loving and gentle.  and not that he isn't USUALLY these things, but it was just so amazing to see. (because as a lot of you know, in third world countries, things rarely go as planned, living conditions are hard, and there is usually a lot to complain about).

It was fun to talk to Bryan at the end of every day and ask him what his favorite parts were.  Before the trip, he thought he was excited to see all the wild animals on the safari. But once we left, he had grown a deep love and respect for the Maasai people. 

On this trip, we had a group of "tour guides" who turned into what seemed like older brothers to us.  Three were from the Maasai culture, and one was from the city (although basically adopted into the Maasai family). There men are Life Coaches for my moms business.  They were so fun, and awesome to hear their stories and get to know. 

 Dalton, David, Dominic and Moses

The Maasai culture is "so Africa"- and by that, I mean exactly what you picture from a National Geographic article when you picture Africa.  From their clothes, dung huts, spears, dancing and singing, traditions of drinking cows blood and killing lions, these people are amazing!

 

As for me, my favorite part of the trip this year was Western Kenya.  In western Kenya, we were able to work on several projects.  We helped create a spring of fresh water that will help over 60 families in that community.  We went around to peoples homes and visited them and gave them donations that we brought (clothes, toys, cooking utensils, etc.)We helped plant a garden for a widow of four children.  And we helped children plant 10 trees each ("I Grow With My Tree Project") so in 10 years, they will be able to cut down and sell their trees that they may be able to go to college.  

 

 

And of course, the Safari! Bryan got some amazing shots of these animals!  Because the Great Migration happened two weeks after we left, we saw less quantity of animals, but much more quality than I have ever seen before.

The people of Africa are so humble and so happy considering how little most of them have. It was such an amazing experience, and I know it will not be our last time being there together.

Nakupenda, Africa.

THANK YOU to the parents who get it!

I have worked with children for the past 8 years of my life between both preschool and swimming lessons.  Because of this, I have worked with literally HUNDREDS of parents, and I just want to give a quick shout out and and appreciation to the parents who just get it.

thank you to the parents who know their child is capable of making a mistake, and that their child was not a victim in every situation. 

thank you to the parents who know that my time is just as valuable as theirs. 

thank you to the parents who don't try to bargain and cut a deal with me, just because they know me really well. (Trust me, I would love to be able to give more swimming lesson deals, but because it's my ONLY source of income in the summers, I can't afford to give discounts)

thank you to the parent's who took time to get to know me (even if just a little bit... "how was your weekend?") 

thank you to the parents who work with their child at home! Whether school or swimming- when they get it more than once they are far more likely to succeed!

thank you to the parents who expressed their appreciation!!! Whether you gave me a nice "end of the year gift", wrote a small note, or just gave me that genuine hand shake and expressed any form of appreciation, that goes a long way and makes my job worth it!

thank you to the parents who see how difficult it can be working with young children and give me little compliments or words of encouragement.  

thank you to the parents who have given me referrals making it possible for Bryan and I to pay our rent each summer.

thank you to the parents who share the stories of their child's successes at home ("My child fell into the pool but was able to swim to the side!" or "My child was able to identify the first letter of their name in a book we read together tonight!")

thank you to parents who give their children incentives! seriously! I even like the occasional bribe because it usually gets kids to conquer their fears.

thank you to the parents who expressed concern, because of this I can help make changes to benefit the child's needs. 


I can't believe I have another school year in the bag! Although this year was extremely difficult and I complained about it almost daily, because of success I was able to see in my students both socially and academically it makes it TOTALLY worth it.  Here's to a summer full of SWIMMING LESSONS!

Utah doesn't get enough street cred.

we love moab. 

Bryan is the best adventure partner ever. 

we are still in love & we have a good time. 

 

 

As of lately update:

i'm not pregnant, but everyone else is pregnant

school is almost out which means its almost swimming lesson season

this weather is making me CRAZY for summer

I'm volunteering a shiz ton

we have been married for a long time

Pretty Much Perfect.

It has been a long time since I last blogged
I have thought about how I should a lot... but I couldn't get myself to sit down and do it. 

I've been looking at a lot of blogs/instagrams/social medias lately and I have found a common theme of all the bloggers out there, and how it appears to me that they all lead perfect lives. They dress impeccably, have the most gorgeous children, and wake up at 5:45 am to go to the gym and post a picture of their perfectly balanced breakfast.
It made me feel quite inadequate to blog, and sort of in life in general.  I mean, obviously I'm not a fashion blogger, nor could I ever be, or want to be for that matter, but they all seem to be just so perfect, right? So I have been trying to convince myself that is a stupid reason to stop blogging, because I don't do it for other people, I do it for myself, really.  I don't keep a journal or anything like that, so a blog is the best record of my most random thoughts I have over the years. 

While I was looking at others blogs, I just found myself asking "seriously? is this really your life? Do you always look like this? Do you always eat like that? Can you really afford to dress yourself/your child like that?" and I just have to keep reminding myself that the answer has to be no.  

Social media is giving me serious brain damage apparently.  of course people aren't all they are portrayed in their best pictures.  But sheesh... it seems like a lot of pressure.  

Like I said, I certainly do NOT consider myself a "blogger" at all! but I find people always commenting on things like Instagram saying  "oh my gosh you guys are perfect!" "You look so good" "I want your life" etc.  I am not here to brag and say that everyone wants my life (i'm 99% sure no one would actually want my life), but even I fell into feeling this pressure of looking, acting, and portraying myself in a certain way.  Like people would literally be disappointed in me if I gained any of my weight back, or people would hate knowing that Bryan and I (although we are very much in love) have certainly had our share of goof ups and arguments. and of course I have with both of those things! but it's like I can't let people know.

Now, I'm not going to do anything drastic like delete all my social media, because I really do enjoy it.  I don't want to get rid of it completely because it occasionally drives me crazy. It's a good way to stay in touch, or see pictures of amazing & beautiful places (and there are a lot of great whale pictures on instragram), but I don't even know what to do.  I know I can't be alone with this sense of pressure.  I read an article not too long ago about people who take a lot of selfies RARELY post the first one they take- they take  tons, sometimes literally hundreds before they get the perfect picture they find worthy of showing to the world.  If I posted the first picture I took, it's usually an accidental frontward facing camera and all I see is my double chin and up my nose.  Now, I probably wouldn't be getting tons of "I want your life" after a picture like that. 

Of course I like getting nice comments and positive feedback on my pictures.  I love comments that say "I love you two!" and even a nice one like "you look so pretty" if I happened to get ready and felt good that day!  but I almost cringe at ones that say "you are perfect".  Seriously. I love my life, and I feel extremely blessed, and I am happy, but please don't get confused and think my life is perfect, because it certainly isn't, and I don't want the pressure to have to pretend that it is.  

I'm done comparing myself to other people based on pictures and thinking my life is lame if I'm not traveling to far away countries and eating expensive food.  I have never been happier with my tight-budget, occasionally messy, basically standard routine, hilariously ridiculous life.  

and with that, I don't "want" anybody else's life.